The other day, I was talking with my cousin who is getting married next year, and we started discussing everything that comes with it. The planning, the excitement, the pressure, all of it. And at some point, I told her something very simple. If there is one piece of advice I would give you, it’s this: take time for the two of you on your wedding day.
It sounds obvious, and honestly, you hear it everywhere. People say it all the time, so you think you understand it. But the truth is, you don’t really realise how important it is until you’re actually living it.
Taking a step back while it is all happening
Our wedding lasted three days, and looking back, the moments that stayed with me the most are not necessarily the ones you would expect. Of course, the ceremonies, the party, the big emotions, all of that is incredible. But what really made a difference were the small pauses we created just for us.
On the Friday, we had our civil ceremony and then everyone drove to the venue where we were all staying. That evening, we organised a welcome dinner, very relaxed, with a barbecue and buffet style, no assigned seating, people moving around, talking, laughing, getting to know each other.
At some point, we decided to sit down, just the two of us, at a big table facing everyone. We didn’t plan anything, we didn’t say anything, we just sat there and watched. All the people we love in the same place, enjoying themselves, creating memories already. And for a few minutes, we just took it in.
Little by little, people came to join us, sat around us, and the moment naturally evolved, but that first pause, that decision to step back instead of being carried by everything, meant a lot.
Creating moments that belong only to you
That same night, when we went back to our room, we had a bathroom with a bathtub, and we decided to sit there together and talk about the day. What did you think of the ceremony, how did you feel, did you notice this or that moment. It was quiet, completely out of time, and just ours.
The next day, after the main wedding, the party went on until around 4:30 in the morning. No one wanted to leave, the energy was still there, we ended up in the kitchen with friends, eating cheese, talking, laughing, very French and very real.
We finally got back to our room around 6am, knowing we had to be up again at 10 for brunch, and still, we took that moment again. We sat down and talked about everything while it was still fresh. The music, the atmosphere, the people, the little details we noticed.
And today, these are some of the memories that feel the most vivid.
Staying together as much as possible
There is something else that was really important to me, and that I don’t see talked about enough. We made a conscious decision to stay together as much as possible throughout the wedding.
Of course, you naturally drift towards your own friends or your own family at times, and that’s completely normal, but I didn’t want us to live two different versions of the same day. I didn’t want to hear afterwards that something had happened and realise I had missed it because I was somewhere else.
I wanted us to share those moments, to experience things at the same time, to build the same memories. So we made the effort to move together, to go and see people together, to keep that connection all day long without forcing it, just being mindful of it.
And it changed everything, because it gave us a real sense of living it as a team.
If there is one thing to remember
If there is one thing you take from this, let it be this. Take time for the two of you. Even if it’s just ten minutes, even if it’s just stepping aside with a drink, even if it’s sitting somewhere quietly in the middle of everything that’s happening.
Your wedding goes by incredibly fast, and those small moments where you pause and reconnect are the ones that stay with you the longest.
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Estelle